10 things that piss me off

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1. People who point at their wrist while asking for the time. I know where my watch is buddy…Where the fuck is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the bathroom is?

2.The Pillsbury Dough Boy is way too happy…considering that he doesn’t have a dick!!

3.People who are willing to get off their ass to search the entire room for the damn tv remote because they refuse to walk to the tv and change it manually!!

4. When people say… “Oh,you just want to have your cake and eat it too”…Fuck off!!!! What good is a damn piece of cake if you can’t eat it?

5. When people say…”It’s always the last place you look”…No shit. Why the fuck would you keep looking for it after you have already found it!?! Do people do this? Who and where are they?

6. When people say, while watching a movie…”Did you see that?” … No dick…I paid $7.50 to come to a theater and stare at the fucking ceiling. What did you come here for?

7.The radio ad…”Hi…I’m Stevie Wonder…Don’t drink and drive. I don’t!”…I hope you don’t drive sober either, Stevie…You’re blind!

8. People who ask…”Can I ask you a question?”…Didn’t really give me a choice there did ya buddy?

9. When something is “new and improved” which is it? If it’s new, then there has never been anything before it. If its improved, then there must have been something before it.

10. When a cop pulls you over and then asks you if you know how fast you were going. You should know asshole…You’re the one that fucking pulled me over.

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