At the Vet
Two dogs, a poodle and a Great Dane, were waiting in their cages at the vet’s office. The poodle was very nervous and started a conversation with the Great Dane by saying, “Boy, did I screw up yesterday.”
His neighbor, being sympathetic, asked what happened.
The poodle explained, “My owner is a very religious lady who recently became engaged to the choir director of her church. His family came over to meet me. I don’t know what it was about his mother, but when she walked in I lost control and started humping her leg. I couldn’t stop. They eventually got a hold of my collar, damn near choked me to death and then threw me in the back room, so now I’m here to be castrated.”
The Great Dane said, “I can understand your situation. My owner is an old spinster who never lets me go out. Yesterday she had just completed her shower and was bent over the tub cleaning it out when I walked by. When I saw her bare ass in the air, I lost control. I mounted her and rode her for all she was worth. I stayed on her until we both collapsed from exhaustion.”
The poodle then said, “So I guess you are here to be castrated also?”
“No,” said the Great Dane, “I’m here to get my nails clipped.”