Bill Clinton Statue Committee

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Bill Clinton Statue Committee
1040 Buffoon Street
Little Rock, AR 72205

Dear Friend:

We have the distinguished honor of being on the committee for raising 5 million dollars for placing a statue of Bill Clinton in the hall of fame in Washington, DC.

This committee was in a quandary as to where to place the statue.

It was not wise to place it beside George Washington, who never told a lie, nor beside Jesse Jackson, who never told the truth, since Bill Clinton could never tell the difference.

We finally decided to place it next to Christopher Columbus, the greatest Democrat of all. He left not knowing where he was going, did not know where he was, and returned, not knowing where he had been, doing it all on borrowed money.

5,000 years ago Moses said, “Pack up your camel, pick up your shovel, move your ass, and I will lead you to the promised land.”

5,000 years later, FDR said, “Lay down your shovel, sit on your ass, light up a Camel; this is the promised land.”

This year, Bill Clinton will steal your shovel, kick your ass, raise the price of Camels, and mortgage the promised land.

If you are one of the fortunate people who has anything left after paying taxes, we expect a generous contribution to this worthwhile project.

Fraternally,

Bill Clinton Statue Committee