Blonde Jokes

Why do blondes like tilt steering?

More headroom

One day two blondes were driving down the street in a car. The driver looks out the window and notices another blonde trying to row a boat in a field!

“It’s blondes like that that give us a bad name,” states the driver.

“Yeah, if I could swim I’d go out there and drown her!” replies the other.

A blonde is speaking to her psychiatrist. She says, “I’m on the road a lot, and my friends are complaining that they can never reach me.”

“Don’t you have a phone in your car?” the psychiatrist asks.

“That was a little too expensive, so I did the next best thing. I put a mailbox in my car.”

Puzzled, he asks, “Uh … How’s that working?”

“Actually, I haven’t gotten any letters yet,” the blonde responded.

“And why do you think that is?”

The blonde thinks for a few seconds, and says, “I figure it’s because when I’m driving around, my zip code keeps changing.”

Q. What does the Bermuda Triangle and a dumb blonde have in common?

A. The both suck down a lot of seamen.

The statuesque blonde walked into a dinner party on the arm of a scowling tycoon. She took her seat at the dinner table while her escort conversed with other guests. A woman sitting nearby couldn’t help staring at the huge gem hanging from her neck.

“Excuse me,” the woman said, “but I must tell you… that is the most gorgeous diamond I’ve ever seen.”

“Why, thank you. It’s the Grumpmeyer Diamond.”

“I’m surprised I’ve never heard of it”, the woman said. “I’m quite familiar with most famous gems.”

“Well,” replied the blonde, “the Grumpmeyer Diamond has a horrible curse attached to it.”

“Really?” said the woman with great interest. “What is it?”

The blonde grimaced and gestured toward her escort. “Grumpmeyer over there.”