Blonde Jokes

Heads Or Tails

Posted in Blonde
1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (4 votes, average: 4.25 out of 5)
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The blonde reported for her University final examination which consists of ‘yes/no’ type questions. She takes her seat in the examination hall, stares at the question paper for five minutes, and then in a fit of inspiration takes her purse out, removes a coin and starts tossing the coin and marking the answer sheet - Yes for Heads and No for Tails.

Within half an hour she is all done whereas the rest of the class is sweating it out.

During the last few minutes, she is seen desperately throwing the coin, swearing and sweating.

The moderator, alarmed, approaches her and asks what is going on.

“I finished the exam in 30 minutes,” she says. “But I’m checking my answers.”


Blonde

Posted in Blonde
1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (4 votes, average: 2.5 out of 5)
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How do you confuse a Blonde in a circular room?

Tell her to piss in the corner …


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  • Blonde newlywed

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    A week after their marriage, these newlyweds paid a visit to their doctor.

    “I can’t figure it out Doctor, my testicles are turning purple!?.”

    The doctor examined him and confirmed the unusual condition. He asked the wife (a blonde, of course), “Are you using the diaphragm I prescribed?”

    “Yes.” she replied.

    “And what kind of jelly are you using?” the doctor then asked.

    “Grape.” she said.


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  • Blonde at a vending machine

    Posted in Blonde
    1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (3 votes, average: 3 out of 5)
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    This blonde is at a vending machine, she puts in a dollar coin, pushes a button and out comes a Coke.

    She is somewhat amazed by this and she proceeds by inserting another coin, pushing a button and getting another Coke, this time she is extremely excited.

    She places the two Cokes down and continues to buy more and more and more until she had over 50 Cokes surrounding her.

    Two males walk by and witness this lady at the vending machine just surrounded with cans of Coke.

    They are curious as to what is going on so they ask the blonde, “What are you doing?”

    The blonde turns around and replies, “Duh! I’m winning”


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  • Bob, Bob, Bob….

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    Two women (one blonde, one brunette) go out for coffee and a chat. The brunette has 3 kids; the blonde has 30 kids.

    Brunette says: “How do you keep track of all those kids?”
    Blonde says: “Oh, it’s easy. All of them are named Bob”
    Brunette says: “How does that work?”
    Blonde says: “Well, when I want them to eat I just say, ‘Bob dinner’ and they all eat, when I say ‘Bob bed,’ they all go to bed.”
    Brunette says: “But would if you just want to talk to one individual?”
    Blonde says: “Oh that’s easy too. I just call them by their last names.”


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