Christian Jokes

One day a Jewish son came home from college and told his dad that he had converted to Christianity. His father went to his Rabbi and said, “My son went away for awhile and came back a Christian. What shall I do?”

The Rabbi said in reply, “Well, you see, the same thing happened to my son. We shall pray to God and ask what we should do.” So the man and the Rabbi prayed to God.

“God, our sons left home for awhile and came back Christians. What shall we do?”

God said, “Funny you should mention that….”

Q: Does light have mass?

A: Of course not, it’s not even a Catholic.

Why doesn’t Jesus play hockey?

He’s afraid to get nailed to the boards.

THREE PROOFS THAT JESUS WAS MEXICAN

His first name was Jesus
He was bilingual
He was always being harassed by the authorities

THREE PROOFS THAT JESUS WAS BLACK

He called everybody “brother”
He liked Gospel
He couldn’t get a fair trial

THREE PROOFS THAT JESUS WAS JEWISH

He went into his father’s business
He lived at home until he was 33
He was sure his Mother was a virgin,
and his Mother was sure he was God

THREE PROOFS THAT JESUS WAS ITALIAN

He talked with his hands
He had wine with every meal
He worked in the building trades

THREE PROOFS THAT JESUS WAS A CALIFORNIAN

He never cut his hair
He walked around barefoot
He started a new religion

THREE PROOFS THAT JESUS WAS IRISH

He never got married
He was always telling stories
He loved green pastures

(and now the MOST Compelling EVIDENCE:)

THREE PROOFS THAT JESUS WAS A WOMAN

He had to feed a crowd, at a moment’s notice, when
there was no food.
He kept trying to get the message across to a bunch of men who just didn’t get it.
Even when he was dead, he had to get up because there was more work for him to do.

One day, Jesus and his disciples were walking down the streets of Heaven and Jesus tripped over a old Man.

He asked the old man what was the matter. He said when he was alive on earth, he had a son.

So Jesus asked him to describe his son. He said that he is very polite and has holes in his hands and feet.

” Father ?!” Jesus said.

The old man looked up and said ” PINOCCHIO?!!!”