Gay Jokes

A priest and a rabbi walked into a bar. After sitting down, ordering, and some chit chat, the priest said, “Have you noticed that there are no women in this bar?” He then realized the truth, “I think we’re in a gay bar.”

A man approached and tried to flirt with the priest. The priest was dumbfounded, and didn’t know quite what to do. The rabbi leaned over and whispered something in the man’s ear.

The man nodded and walked off.

The relieved priest said, “Thanks. What did you tell him?”

The rabbi replied, “I just told him we’re on our honeymoon.”

A young gay man calls up his mother to tell her that he is giving up being gay as he has met the woman who, he believes, is his soul mate. In fact he says, “We are so much in love that we plan to get married next month! That’s why I called you. I’m sure you will be happy to know that I have turned my back on the gay lifestyle.”

“I am very happy indeed,” says his mother. “But would it be too much to ask if she is also Jewish?”

The man says, “Mother, not only is she Jewish, she comes from a wealthy Beverly Hills family.”

“That is wonderful news!” The mother then asks, “Tell me, what is the name of my future daughter-in-law?”

The man says, “Monica Lewinsky.”

There was a long moment of silence on the other end - so long that the man is alarmed. Fearing that she may have fainted or worse, he says, “Mother, are you still there?”

“I’m still here,” says the mother. “Now whatever happened to that nice Catholic boy you were dating last year?”
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What’s the difference between a straight rodeo and a gay rodeo?

At a straight rodeo, they yell, “Ride that sucker!”

Q:What do you call a bouncer at a gay bar?

A: A “flame-thrower.”

Peter Peter pumpkin eater saw this girl but couldn’t meet her.
Saw her brother one fine day, sucked his dick and now he’s gay.