Man and Woman Jokes

Cultural diversity

Posted in Man and Woman
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At a local college, there was a dance.. this guy from America asked the girl from Sweden to dance. While they were dancing, he gives her a little squeeze, and says, “In America, we call this a hug.”

She says, “yaah, in Sveden, we call it a hug too.”

A little later, he gives her a peck on the cheek, and says, “In America, we call this a kiss.”

She says, “Yaah, in Sveden, we call it a kiss too.”

A long time later, and a lot of drinks later, he takes her out on the campus lawn, and proceeds to bop her, and says, “In America, we call this a grass sandwich”

She says, “Yaaah in Sveden, we call it a grass sandwich too, but…we usually put more meat in it.”


How to be Politically Correct when talking about Men…

Posted in Man and Woman, Politics
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How to be Politically Correct when talking about Men…

He does not have a beer gut…
He has developed a Liquid Grain Storage Facility.

He is not quiet…
He is a Conversational Minimalist.

He is not stupid…
He suffers from Minimal Cranial Development.

He does not get lost all the time…
He discovers Alternative Destinations.

He is not balding…
He is in Follicle Regression.

He is not a cradle robber…
He prefers Generationally Differential Relationships.

He does not get falling-down drunk…
He becomes Accidentally Horizontal.

He does not have his head up his ass…
He suffers from Rectal-Cranial Inversion.

He is not short…
He is Anatomically Compact.

He does not have a rich daddy…
He is a Recipient of Parental Asset Infusion.

He does not constantly talk about cars…
He has a Vehicular Addiction.

He does not have a hot body…
He is Physically Combustible.

He is not unsophisticated…
He is Socially Challenged.

He does not eat like a pig…
He suffers from Reverse Bulimia.

He is not a bad dancer…
He is Overly Caucasian.

He is not a sex machine…
He is Romantically Automated.

He does not hog the blankets…
He is Thermally Unappreciative.

He is not a male chauvinist pig…
He has Swine Empathy.

He does not undress you with his eyes…
He has an Introspective Pornographic Moment.

He is not afraid of commitment…
He is Monogamously Challenged.


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  • Truth 2

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    Why don’t women need watches?

    Because there is a clock on the stove.


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  • A Woman President?

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    Why will there never be a woman president?

    Because we would have a war once a month.


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    How do you turn a dishwasher into a snowblower?

    Give her a shovel.


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