Mexican Jokes

A Mexican is trying to cross the border to America when a border guard stops him.

The border guard says to the Mexican that before he can cross he has to make a sentence for every word that the border guard gives him.

The border guard tells him that he has to use the words green, pink, and yellow.

The Mexican agrees and says, “Ok I’m ready.”

The border guard says,”Ok go ahead.”

The Mexican says,” The telephone goes green green green….. I pink it up…… And I say yellow!”

Why did the Mexican throw his wife out of the window?

Ta’kill’ha

Three Texans cross the border into Mexico one night, get drunk and wake up in a Mexican jail. They are told that they are to be executed for their crimes but none of them can remember what they have done.

The first guy is strapped in the electric chair and is asked if he has any last words. He says, “I am a graduate student from the Baylor School of Divinity and I believe in the almighty power of God to intervene on behalf of the innocent.” They throw the switch and nothing happens, so they assume God does not want this guy to die, and they let him go.

The second guy is strapped in and is asked for his last words. “I am a graduate student at the University of Texas School of Law and I believe in the eternal power of Justice to protect the innocent.” The switch is thrown, and again nothing happens. Believing that Justice has intervened, they release him.

The last guy is strapped in and is asked his last words. “I am a graduate student in Electrical Engineering at Texas A&M, and I’ll tell you right now you’ll never electrocute anybody if you don’t replace that burnt fuse.”

Why did the blonde sleep with the Mexican?

Her teacher told her to do an essay.

There was a Scotsman, American,and a Mexican. They were driving along a road in Canada. They all saw a cow and the Mexican said, “That is a Mexican cow because of the spots.”

“No,no,no!” said the American. “That is an American cow because of the way it walks.”

“No, you are both wrong!” said the Scotsman. “It is a Scottish cow because of the bagpipes underneath.”