Politics Jokes

Did you know they’re having a hard time with the DNA on Monica Lewinsky’s dress….

It seems everyone in Arkansas has the same DNA!

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You know how Bill & Hillary met don’t you?…..

They dated the same girl in college!

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Did you hear Hillary is now getting up at 4 AM every morning?……

She stated the she is going to be the First Lady!

What does D.C. mean?

Disappearing Cigars.

There’s something everyone should know: On July 8, 1947, witnesses claim a spaceship with five aliens aboard crashed on a sheep-and-cattle ranch outside Roswell, NM, an incident they say has been covered up by the military.

On March 31, 1948, nine months after that day, Al Gore was born.

That clears up a lot of things.

Out for a walk one afternoon, I came upon a fence around this cow pasture. On this fence was a sign that stated, “Beware of the BULL.”

Now I am not one to doubt the warnings on signs, but it did seem to be a shortcut across the pasture to where I wanted to go. I looked very carefully in every direction and no BULL did I see.

Weighing the decision very carefully, it seemed that crossing this cow pasture was a safe and time-saving way to go, since I could see no BULL.

About halfway across the pasture, I spotted the BULL. It was the biggest and meanest-looking BULL that I had ever seen. He had long, sharp horns and was coming straight towards me. My one stroke of luck was that evidently this BULL hadn’t seen me yet.

I looked around quickly and, much to my dismay, there was not a tree big enough to climb anywhere close enough to be of any help to me. The only thing there were some bushes. However, one of the bushes was large enough to hide behind.

I had to make a decision quickly before the BULL saw me. What should I do? GET BEHIND A BUSH . . . OR GET GORED!

Q: How are Monica’s dress and transvestite sailors different?

A: With the sailors it’s a dress on the seamen.