Religious Jokes

The visiting church school supervisor asks little Johnny
during Bible class who broke down the walls of Jericho.
Little Johnny replies that he does not know, but it
definitely is not him.

The supervisor, taken aback by this lack of basic Bible
knowledge goes to the school principal and relates the
whole incident.

The principal replies that he knows little Johnny as well
as his whole family very well and can vouch for them, if
little Johnny said that he did not do it, he as principal is
satisfied that it is the truth.

Even more appalled, the inspector goes to the regional
Head of Education and relates the whole story.

After listening he replies: “I cannot see why you are
making such a big issue out of this; we will get three
quotations and fix the damned wall.”

An 85 year old woman was standing at a bus stop. The wind was really blowing. She had her hands up on her head holding her hat to keep it from blowing away. With her hands on her hat the wind was blowing her dress up over her waist. Everything could be seen.

A young man came up to her and asked, “Why are standing in the wind holding your hat? Your dress blowing over your waist. Everyone at the bus stop is looking. Everyone driving by is looking. Everyone can see everything under your dress!”

The older woman replied, “Son, I have have given birth to seven children. Everything under this skirt looks and is 85 years old ………..I just bought this hat!”

Q. How do you catch a unique rabbit?

A. You ‘neak up on it.

Q. How do you catch a tame rabbit?

A. Tame way.

A drunk staggers into a Catholic church and sits down in a confession box. He remains quiet for several minutes, so the bewildered priest coughs to get his attention. Still, the man says nothing.

Finally, the priest knocks on the wall three times to get the man to speak.

“No use knockin’, fella,” says the drunk. “There’s no paper in this one either.”

He who drinks…
Gets drunk,
He who gets drunk…
Goes to sleep,
He who goes to sleep…
Does no sin
He who does no sin…
Goes to Heaven,
So let’s all drink and go to Heaven!!!