Yo Mama Jokes

Your mama is so fat she got hit by a bus and said who threw that rock.

Q. What’s the best advice a mother can give her daughter?

A. You don’t actually blow!

Yo Mama so fat she has her own area code.

Yo Mama so fat she had to make a bra out of two parachutes.

Yo Mama so fat she can be on three continents at once.

Yo Mama so fat she has more chins than a Chinese phone book.

Yo Momma so Fat - she’s gonna be oil in a million years.

On their third night after the wedding, the two blissful newlyweds shut off the lights and crawl under the covers.

Turning amorously towards his bride, Joshua tenderly informs his wife that tonight he wants a hand job instead of the usual stuff. She, being the proper girl that she is, had absolutely no idea what a “hand job” was.

So, she gets out of bed, puts on her robe and heads for the phone to call her mom.

“Mom,” she says, “Josh wants a hand job, and I don’t know what he means.”

“Oh, Honey,” says her mother, “that’s real simple. Just grab his thing and shake it like you were trying to get ketchup out of a bottle.”

“Gee, Mom, that’s easy enough,” she replies. So she hangs up the phone, removes her robe and crawls back into the sack. She snuggles up to Josh, grabs his thing firmly with one hand and starts beating the end with her other.