Contractions
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Loading ...There was this happily married couple that decided to have a baby. After nine hard long months the mother finally started having contractions and it was time to go to the hospital.
The mother was really scared of all the pain she was going to go through so she told the doctors that she wanted all the drugs she could get.
The head doctor said, “We have designed a new device that transfers the pain from the mother of the baby to the father. It is still in testing but you are welcome to try it.” She said “Sounds great let her rip.” So the doctors hook up the device and the contractions start.
AHHHH AHHH! She is writhing in pain and the father can’t feel a thing.
They crank the machine up to 20%. She is in absolute agony. The father says “wow this pregnantcy thing is a piece of cake. Crank the pain factor up to 50%.” They turn the machine up and the father still isn’t feeling a thing. Meanwhile the mother is desperately seeking other means of pain control. Argh argh!!
The father finally says, “Well if the pain is like this at 50% why not take it the full 100%. I think i can take it.” So the doctors wind the machine up to 100% and the man still can’t feel a thing.
Finally the baby pops out and the mother’s pain is over. The man proclaims, “I never thought pregnancy would be so easy.” The mother scowls at him for being so arrogant.
Anyway it comes time to take the baby home and when this happy new family get home they find their postman dead on the doorstep.
