Damn Yankees
During the American Civil War, a particular captured Confederate soldier was a hard man to handle.
Constantly, in his soft drawl, he would say, “Anyway, we beat the hell out of you sniveling Yankee dogs at Fredericksburg.”
The Northern sergeant in charge could not punish the impertinent prisoner as he would have liked because there was a drive on at the time to make sure that prisoners were treated humanely. Finally, however, he could stand it no more.
He marched the prisoner out with a squad of soldiers and said, “Listen, you damned Reb, I don’t care if it means my court-martial, but I’m going to have you shot if you don’t swear allegiance to the United States.”
The prisoner, weighing the murder in the sergeant’s eyes, swore allegiance.
“Now,” said the sergeant, “you did this before witnesses. You’re a loyal American. If I hear any snide remarks about the American Army, you’ll be a traitor. It may be against the articles of war to shoot prisoners, but it’s perfectly all right to shoot traitors.”
The ex-Confederate soldier thought about that for awhile, then he said, “Okay, sergeant, but ain’t it a stinking, filthy shame what them damned rebels did to us Yankees at Fredericksburg?”