Dear Abby

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Dear Abby,
I’ve been going out with this girl for a couple of weeks now, I really like her and want to take the relationship to the next level. I have one problem though. On our first date she told me she was sick, but I can’t remember if she said she had TB or VD. What should I do? - Lovelorn, Portland, OR

Dear Lovelorn:
If she coughs, fuck her.

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