Drunken man

There is this cop who is running low on his quota for the month and decides to check out one of the rowdier bars in town to catch some drunks. So, he’s waiting outside when about closing time this guy walks out, staggering, and falls down on the sidewalk. The cop is thinking, “boy, he’s drunk, this will be a good arrest.” The drunk guy crawls to his car, fiddles with his keys for about 30 minutes until he finds the right one to unlock the door. The cop is watching intently and smiling. Then the drunk gets in his car and fiddles with the keys again, trying to find the one that will start the car. By this time people have left and the bar is officially closed. When the drunk guy finally starts his engine and proceeds to drive away, the cop pulls him over and reads him his rights as he is handcuffing him. The cop then gives him the breathylizer test. It registers 0.0. The cop says, “What the hell, you mind explaining this to me?” and the drunk says, “Well, sir, tonight, I was the designated decoy.”

This joke is filed under Funny Stories.