Fable

There once was a poor lad named Timmy who had the misfortune of being born with only a head — no arms, no legs, nothing but a head.

Now Timmy was a basically happy person and he was loved and cared for by his family. As long as he stayed within the shelter of his family he was unworried by his condition, but as soon as he was thrust out into the world he knew that something was seriously wrong. He began to dream about being a whole person with arms and legs and a body. He thought of nothing else. It became an obsession.

Then one day Timmy heard of the famous Dr. Helen Von Rigginbottom, a physician who had been experimenting with cloning and tissue regeneration. Timmy grew so excited he could hardly contain himself. He had himself rushed to the doctor and made an appointment.

When the doctor met with Timmy all of his hopes and dreams came true. The doctor assured Timmy that she could help him and would make him into a whole person, but she warned him that it could be a dramatic change and he should consider all of the ramifications. She began to list some of the many problems he might have, but he would not listen. She consented and gave Timmy the injection that would start the process. Timmy went home and tossed and turned on his pillow all night. Eventually, he fell asleep.

The next morning when he awoke Timmy was surprised to discover that he was a whole person. He had arms and legs and a body. He was so excited and grateful that he just had to thank the doctor, so he ran out of the house, across the street and was hit by a truck and killed.

And of course the moral of our story is: While you’re a head, stay ahead.

This joke is filed under Funny Stories.