Farmer Dan
(1 votes, average: 1 out of 5)
Loading ...Farmer Dan buys several pigs, hoping to breed them for bacon, ham, etc… After a few weeks, he notices that none of the pigs are getting pregnant, and he calls the vet for help.
The vet tells the farmer that he should try artificial insemination.
The farmer doesn’t have the slightest clue as to what this means, but not wanting to display his ignorance, he only asks the vet how he will know when the pigs became pregnant. The vet tells him that they will stop standing around and will instead, lay down and will wallow in the mud.
The farmer hangs up and gives this some thought. He comes to the conclusion that artificial insemination means that he has to impregnate the pigs, so he loads the pigs up in his truck, drives them out into the woods, has sex with them all, brings them back and goes to bed.
Next morning, he wakes up and looks out at the pigs. Seeing that they’re all standing around, he concludes that the first try didn’t take, so he loads them in the truck again, and drives them into the woods, has sex with them all twice, (just for good measure), brings them back and goes to bed.
Next morning he wakes, only to find the pigs still just standing around. “One more try,” he tells himself, and proceeds to load them up and drive them into the woods again. He spends all day having sex with the pigs and upon returning home, falls into bed, exhausted.
The next morning, he cannot even raise himself from the bed to look out at the pigs. He asks his wife to look and tell him if the pigs are laying in the mud.
“No,” she says, “they are all in the truck and one of them is honking the horn.”