Honeymoon gifts
The day before his wedding this guy decides to play a game of baseball with his buddies. Playing shortstop he gets hit in the ‘nads with a line drive.
He goes to the doctor in a lot of pain, but the doctor tells him there is nothing he can do except wrap it up. So the doc takes a few tongue depressors and wraps it in a splint.
The next night on his honeymoon his lovely wife comes to him dressed in a nightgown.
Taking down the top she shows him her breasts. She proudly says “No man has ever touched these, I have been saving them for just you for tonight.”
Surprised but not to be outdone, her new husband pulls down his pants and says, “Look at this, honey, still in the crate.”