Little Johnny Quickies

Teacher: Little Johnny, go to the map and find North
America.
Little Johnny: Here it is!
Teacher: Correct. Now, class, who discovered America?
Class: Little Johnny!
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Teacher: Are you chewing gum?
Little Johnny: No, I’m Little Johnny.
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Teacher: How can one person make so many stupid
mistakes in one day?
Little Johnny: I get up early.
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Teacher: Didn’t you promise to behave?
Little Johnny: Yes, sir.
Teacher: And didn’t I promise to punish you if you
didn’t?
Little Johnny: Yes, sir, but since I broke my promise,
you don’t have to keep yours.
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Little Johnny: Teacher, would you punish me for
something I didn’t do?
Teacher: Of course not.
Little Johnny: Good, because I didn’t do my homework.
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Teacher: Why are you late?
Little Johnny: Because of the sign.
Teacher: What sign?
Little Johnny: The one that says, “School Ahead, Go
Slow. “That’s what I did.
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Teacher: I hope I didn’t see you looking at Don’s
paper.
Little Johnny: I hope you didn’t either.
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Teacher: Well, at least there’s one thing I can say
about your son.
Father: What’s that?
Teacher: With grades like these, he couldn’t be
cheating.
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Teacher: Johnny, give me a sentence starting with “I”.
Little Johnny: I is…
Teacher: No, Little Johnny. Always say “I am.”
Little Johnny: All right. “I am the ninth letter of
the alphabet.”
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This joke is filed under Little Johnny.