Mensan Musings

FAILURE IS NOT AN OPTION! It comes bundled with the software.

I want to die while asleep like my Grandfather, not screaming in terror like the passengers in his car.

I can’t dial NINE-ELEVEN in an emergency, because there’s no ELEVEN on my phone.

Kentucky: Five Million People, Fifteen Last Names.

What is a free gift? Aren’t all gifts free?

Can you yell “MOVIE!” in a crowded fire station?

If ignorance is bliss, why aren’t more people happy?

To vacillate or not to vacillate, that is the question….or is it?

Be nice to your kids. They will be choosing your nursing home.

A closed mouth gathers no foot.

First draw the curve, then plot the data.

ILLINOIS… The Land of the Voting Dead

REMEMBER, HALF THE PEOPLE IN THE WORLD ARE BELOW AVERAGE.

What happens if you get scared half to death twice?

This joke is filed under Funny Stories.