Minnesota Guide to Computer Lingo

LOG ON: makin’ da vood stove hotter
LOG OFF: don’t add no vood
MONITOR : keep a eye on da vood stove
MEGAHERTZ: vhen a big log drops on your barefoot in da morning
FLOPPY DISK: vhat you get from piling too much vood
RAM: da hydraulic t’ing dat makes da voodsplitter vork
DRIVE: gettin’ home during most of da vinter
PROMPT: vhat ya vish da mail vas during da snow season
ENTER: come on in
WINDOWS: vhat ya shut vhen it gets 10 below
SCREEN: vhat is a must during black fly season
CHIP: vhat ya munch during da Vikings games
MICROCHIP: vhat’s left in da bag vhen da chips are gone
MODEM: vhat ya did to da hay fields last Yuly
DOT MATRIX: Gunnar Matrix’s wife
LAPTOP: vhere da grandkids sit
KEYBOARD: vhere ya suppose to put da keys so da Missus can find ‘em
SOFTWARE: da plastic picnic utensils, ya?
MOUSE: vhat leaves dem little turds in da cupboard
MAINFRAME: da part of da sauna that holds up da roof
PORT: vhere da commericial fishin’ boats dock
RANDOM ACCESS MEMORY: vhen ya can’t remember how much ya spent on da new deer rifle vhen da wife asks about it

This joke is filed under Ethnic Cultural.