Jokes News

What is the difference between your grandmother and a bowling ball?

You’d eat the bowling ball if you had to.

Three men were driving through the country when their truck broke down. It was bad weather and they had no place to go.
Of course the farmer came along and said they could spend the night with him under one condition. He had a son who had no ears and got very upset if anything was said about it.

Later that evening at dinner one of the men kept staring at the boy. The boy, getting upset, asks “What are you staring at?”

The man says, “Oh, it’s your teeth, your teeth are so pretty, and make sure you take care of them or they will end up just like mine!” and he takes his teeth out.

The second man kept staring and staring at the boy. The boy getting more upset asks the man “What are you staring at?”

“Oh,” the man says, “It’s your hair, you have the prettiest hair I have ever seen, and make sure you take care of it or it will end up just like mine!” and he takes his wig off.

The third man kept staring and staring and the boy was really irritated at this point and says, “What the hell are you staring at?”

“Oh,” the man says “It’s your eyes, you have the prettiest eyes I have ever seen and make sure you take care of them because you don’t have any ears to put glasses on.”

There was a blonde nurse that worked at a nursing home. She came into the nursing home one morning with this red permanent marker in her breast pocket.

The CNA said to her, “Why are you carrying around a red permanent marker in your pocket?”

Then she looks at the CNA and adds: “I carry around the red pen in case I have to draw blood!”

In the first presidential debate, Gore was considered “too pushy”. In the second debate, he was regarded as “too passive.”

After the third debate, I think we will all know the final analysis: “Too pussy.”

One fellow walks up to another and says “Say, how are you doing?”

The other chap says “Geez, I’m really tired”.

The other man says, “Really, how come?”

“Well, my girlfriend and I agreed that we won’t go to bed angry at each other”.

The other chap says “so?”

“…I’ve been up since Tuesday”….”