Parrot on Titanic
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Loading ...Mrs. VanAstor was seated beside her luggage in the First Class Passenger waiting room beside the pier at South Hampton, preparing to board the HMS Titanic when a British sailor approached her with a parrot.
“Excuse me, Mum,” said the limey, “but Butch, that’s me parrot here, we wuz lookin forward to visitin the Colonies but I wuz just told they had enuff staff and I’m not needed, and Butch is terrible disappointed. Would you mind takin him with you? He wouldn’t be no trouble.”
Mrs.VanAstor graciously agreed to take Butch aboard, but the parrot, who had spoken like an English Gentleman when on shore, swore like a drunken sailor once he was on board, embarrassing poor Mrs.VanAstor and her very proper friends at every opportunity. In fact, it got to the point that she no longer allowed Butch out of the cabin, and looked forward to arriving in New York the following day.
She was preparing for bed when she suddenly began to hear screaming and staff banging on the stateroom doors, ordering all women and children into the lifeboats.
Mrs.VanAstor grabbed Butch and ran along the corridor of the heavily listing ship until she came to a doorway leading to the Promenade where the lifeboats should have been, but the last of them had just been lowered to the water. A crewman in the lifeboat saw Mrs.VanAstor and shouted to her to jump, but as she did so, she slipped and fell into the water some thirty feet from the lifeboat, where she could not be seen in the blackness of the night.
Clutching a piece of flotsam, poor Mrs.VanAstor bobbed up and down a few moments until she heard a familiar voice.
“HOW’S YER ASS?” squawked Butch, perched atop a life preserver.
Mrs.VanAstor, furious with him, shouted back “SHUT UP!!”
“MINE TOO”, screeched Butch. “MUST BE THIS ICY WATER!!”