The Morning After

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The angry wife met her husband at the door. There was alcohol on his breath and lipstick on his collar.

“I assume,” she snarled, “that there is a very good reason for you to come waltzing in here at six o’clock in the morning, with beer on your breath, and lipstick on your collar?”

“There is,” he replied. “I’d like some breakfast.”

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  • The Morning After …

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    One night a guy got really drunk. In the morning, he rolled over and sleeping peacefully beside him was the ugliest girl he’d ever seen.

    Very quietly, he slipped his arm out from under her, got up, and dressed as fast as he could. He put a twenty-dollar bill on the bureau and started to tip-toe out.

    Just then he felt a tug on his pant leg. Looking down, he saw a girl just as ugly as the one in the bed.

    She looked up at him, smiled a toothless smile, and asked, “What? Nothing for the bridesmaid?”

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