Thoughts from Mom
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Loading ...If at first you don’t succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer.
Everyone has a photographic memory; some don’t have film.
The universe is a figment of its own imagination.
If you choke a smurf, what color does it turn?
Radioactive cats have 18 half-lives.
There are three kinds of people: Those who can count; those who can’t.
Who is General Failure and why is he reading my hard disk?
Death is hereditary.
What happens if you get scared half to death twice?
Multitasking - screwing up several things at once.
Dyslexics of the world, etinu!
How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink?
Friends may come and go, but enemies tend to accumulate.
Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity.
I used to have an open mind, but my brains kept falling out.
If you can’t convince them confuse them.
A good pun is its own reword.
Why do psychics have to ask you your name?
There’s no future in time travel.
“Drink your milk, before it gets cold.”
“Don’t chew with your mouth full.”
