When should you retire to Florida
(1 votes, average: 1 out of 5)
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When your wife gives your favorite polyester leisure suit to Goodwill and a teenager shows up at your door wearing it on Halloween night.
When you throw away your alarm clock and let your bladder wake you up at 7am every morning.
When you mention Pearl Harbor to your Grandson and he says he heard of her didn’t she use to sing with a big band?
When you realize that you have underwear older than the quarterback on your favorite NFL team.
When you discover that the lifetime guarantees on everything you own has expired.
When you turn on your computer and DOS 3.5 comes up as your operating system.
When the kids at Burger King are getting paid more than you ever made per hour in your life.
When an aluminum walker becomes your main form of transportation.
When the only bird you can name is the Early Bird.
When you try to lick a stamp that is self-adhesive.
When you find you have a full-length beaver coat in your closet.
When the can of Coffee in your kitchen cupboard is Pre-Columbian.
When you find out the house next door sold for $250,000 and you paid only $18,000 for yours.
When all you ever watch on TV is the History channel and Turners Movie Classics.
When your Limo driver shows up at the front door in a new black suite and you think he’s the undertaker.
When all those brown spots on your arms and hands will not wash off.
When you drop off your teeth at the dentist’s office to be worked on.
When you have a key ring with over 30 keys on it and all you really use are two.
When your favorite shoes are white and your favorite slacks are lime green.