Your Place or Mine

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Two people in their mid-seventies have been seeing each other socially for nearly two years. They have even traveled together but always took separate hotel rooms.

One evening at dinner, old Bert says to Edna, “I been thinking, and we’re wasting a heluva lot of money. We pay rent on two apartments, insurance on two cars, two cable bills, two phones…there ain’t no end to it.”

“What are you saying, Bert?” asks Edna sweetly.

“Hell, we should move in together” says Bert. “We’re practically livin’ like a couple anyways.”

“Whose apartment would we live in?” asks Edna.

“Mine,” says Bert. “It’s bigger ‘n cheaper.”

“Which car would we keep?”

“Yours, it’s newer ‘n gets better mileage.”

“Who’d cook?”

“You cook and I’ll set the table ‘n do the dishes.”

“What about sex?” blushes Edna.

“Infrequently,” replies Bert.

Edna smiles, “Is that one word or two?”

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