Helga the Housekeeper

It was a hot day in Mississippi and Helga, the family’s German housekeeper, had hung the wash outside to dry, baked a strudel and then went into town to pick up dry-cleaning and buy groceries.

“Gootness zakes”, she thought to herself as she walked to the cleaners, “It sure iss hodt.”

As she happened to pass a tavern, she pictured a frosty cold drink, so she went inside and sat down at the bar.

“Afternoon, Maam,” smiled the friendly bartender. “What would y’all like?”

“Chee,” said Helga, “It’s so hodt, I zink I vould like a nice coldt beer, yah?”

“Yes, Maam,” said the barkeep, setting a glass on the bar. “Anheuser Busch?”

“Oh fine, zanks,” blushed Helga, “An how’s your pecker?”

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